I didn’t quite make it through all the paper yesterday, but at least it’s in two neat stacks instead of haphazard piles. I did sort out a bag to recycle. All the bills are in one place along with receipts ready to log into the budget. There is also a much smaller stack of scrapbook paper to use for art cards. Most of it went into the give-away box and some to my students.
What left last night:
- a bag full of paper recycle
- a stack of scrapbook paper for the thrift store
- a storage box that was emptied
- a stack of magazines
- two shirts from my winter box that I sorted out and put up
Today is a new day. I’m looking around and seeing the big picture or the big mess. Not in the best of moods. Its seems like progress is infinitesimal or non-existent. I think that I’m likely just in a down mood.
I took my husband to work and then stopped in Target to pick up a few things for my cleaning job tonight. I also wandered a bit looking at the new displays. I did see some stuff that I wanted (but didn’t need). The “what-ifs” started up in my head. You know – “if I had that I could….” – train of thought. That thing would make everything all better. I could use that for…
Then I thought of my new friend. The guy with the Mary Poppins backpack. The one that seemed to have everything he needed. And I realized that nothing I could buy in that store would make anything any better. I am the only one that can fix things.
It’s going to take more hard work and more decisions. I’m going to need to keep working at it – one pile at a time, one item at a time, one mess at a time. More things won’t fix anything. More things are the problem.
So, I’m back home. And I’ve found five things for today:
- a stuffed animal that was given to me out of love and I appreciate it very much. The love is staying, but the stuffed animal is going.
- two T-shirts that aren’t worn
- two more magazines that I haven’t had time to read. They may indeed contain information that might, maybe, change my life, but I know getting them out of here certainly will.
- another box of old business documents – the guest room isn’t totally a storage room anymore – there is bare floor in spots!
- an incomplete set of alphabet stencils. I have a new set. Why was I keeping the old ones?
Infinitesimal steps maybe. Barely moving forward maybe. But, at least moving. And I know that the decisions that I’m making are changing for the better. I didn’t buy anything today that I didn’t really need. I didn’t bring anything home that will leave in a future declutter. Things are getting better…slowly.
Bad moods happen and that’s okay. It’s not the end of the world and I’m not going to give up. I am going to give in a bit and rest and make some art cards.
I like life today. I don’t love it, but there is always tomorrow.