I had a post all planned out in my head, but I don’t think that I can write it tonight. I’m just “full” and “empty” at the same time. Full of emotions and tiredness and stress and fear…empty of strength and optimism and energy.
This month has been a long haul so far. Some bad stuff and some good. Mostly my focus has had to been on the bad because it had to be dealt with first. The good stuff I shall ponder and reflect upon later when the pace is not so hectic.
My sister continues to slowly recover from her surgery. That’s good. It’s been more challenging than she anticipated, but things are getting better.
School schedules and homework are not yet a habit, but are becoming more familiar each day. Soon that will be easier to deal with.
I went and saw my son’s new apartment today. We packed up some more of his stuff and took a load of boxes over there. It’s a nice place and I am excited for this new chapter in his life. It’s a good thing. It’s what we raise our children to do. Yet, I am sad that this chapter is ending. That’s all I can say about that right now.
Oldest daughter leaves tomorrow to begin her season at the Texas Renaissance Festival. That is a good thing also. She loves her job and has been home for quite a while. I know she’s anxious to rejoin her “family” there. She misses them. I couldn’t have made it through this month without her. It’s time for her to go. Yet, I’m sad.
I’m tired of crying and being sad and crying and being happy. I’m tired of change and excited for the changes. I want the kids to be little again and I know that its time for them to fly away. I’m afraid of how quiet it’s going to be and wondering about the possibilities of the free time. Mainly, I’m tired and afraid.
This turned out to be a post after all. Short and rambling…full and empty at the same time. There is more to be said and somehow it says it all…at the same time.
Today is almost over and tomorrow is on its way. Time keeps moving on by and change comes with it. Change is neither bad nor good. It just is. And so is life.
The end and the beginning.
Visual artist playing with collage, assemblage and whatever else I imagine. Homemaker and homeschooling Mom of four children aged 10 to 24. Ready to fully embrace life and leave regret and fear behind. Each new day is an opportunity to love, create and live with intention...