the view from here

Monday morning.

The start of a new week – ready to go after a restful weekend!

This is what my Monday looks like…

Not pictured are the soon to arrive 2 year old, the home-school planning I forgot to do for this week, the hungry chickens calling to me, or the myriad of unfinished (and not yet started) projects all around me.

It feels like total chaos.

There was a time when I would have been paralyzed with anxiety over the whole situation.

I’m still not happy about it.

But, I have been working on approaching the whole mess without judgement.

This is the reality of what it is.

I am responsible for it, but the mess is not who I am.

I need to get it cleaned up and dealt with it.

I am not a failure or worthless or incompetent or…

Those labels still bounce around in my head, but I am working on quieting them.

And I am making progress.

There is a lot going on in life right now and I’ll never get it all done.

Life is not a list to be completed.

I’ll put a load of laundry in.

I’ll pick up the trash that my Basset Hound dragged out again. I’ll also pause and rub her belly because she is who she is and going through trash is what she does. If the trash had been taken out, she wouldn’t have waited until I went to sleep to climb up on top of the counter to get to it. Mental note: take out the damn trash before I go to bed.

While my daughter puts up the clean dishes, I’ll schedule her school assignments.

Then I’ll load the dishwasher up again while being grateful that we have food and my husband is essential and employed.

Hopefully, before the kiddo gets here.

When he gets here, we’ll do our morning snuggles and breakfast…because the mess will wait.

We’ll go feed the bok-boks together and check out what’s growing in the new garden beds “we” built. We’ll come in and change his clothes because he is two and it rained recently.

We’ll throw his dirty clothes into the next wash load and he’ll “help” fold laundry.

I’ll do the best that I can and work through it…

while remembering that everyone is worthy of grace and love and kindness…myself included.

I don’t yet know what tomorrow will look like.

I am hopeful that the mess will be lessened somewhat, but I’m sure that there will still be something left to do.

2 thoughts on “the view from here

  1. Being kind to others is so much simpler than being kind to yourself!

    It may sound silly, but I get pretty proud of myself if I get only one thing accomplished in the chaos that is my house. Granted, I end up feeling awful at the end of the day because it was only ONE THING, but it’ll be one less than what I’ll have to do tomorrow. I just keep chipping away at it because (hopefully) soon it will be better.

    Thank you for this. It’s been a rough week, and it’s nice to know that things’ll get a little bit better than what they were before.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Experience is a good teacher and things do get better in some ways! I just keep trying to let go of things that are only complicating my life, but decluttering is so hard for me. You’re probably not giving yourself for credit for everything you accomplish. Got kids and pets? Are they alive at the end of the day? Win! Bonus points for the kids. Pets under 5 pounds don’t count. Were they fed? Another win. You didn’t run away screaming in defeat? Good job! Hang in there.

      Liked by 1 person

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