With great effort, I am posting some of these pages without offering apologies for the shortcomings that I so clearly see.
I just keep muttering to myself, “Process, not product…”
Sometimes it’s just too hard being me.
This journal page was done yesterday.
And then today, I witnessed yet another disturbing incident on facebook.
A friend posted an opinion on another friend’s post.
A differing opinion.
And she was attacked.
There is no other word for it.
And she wasn’t wrong. Her comment had merit.
It just wasn’t the “popular” thing to say.
It brought light to the fact that the issue is not black and white.
There is no easy answer.
And I have to wonder…
Where is conversation?
Where is discussion?
Where is respect?
And in this instance, where is the Christianity?
Have your opinion. Have a strong opinion. Believe you are right…
March, gather, protest, follow your heart and work for change.
But never forget that the person you are sharing words with
throwing words at…
Has an opinion.
And is a living, breathing, feeling human being…
With their own story and beliefs.
What about being quiet for a moment and listening…
Where is the love that you profess to have for humanity when you can’t treat a differing opinion with respect and dignity?
And all that I can think and believe is that when hate is the response to a differing opinion there is no winner.
We all lose.
Yesterday’s journal page – an anxiety doodle done throughout a very stressful day. As everything worked out well by the end of the day, I cut up the “anxiety” and glued it to a page.
The day started out rough.
First off, I noticed all the little things that were undone around the house and began by wondering if taking the time for art was worthwhile. The dishes undone, the laundry undone, the trash the dogs got into strewn around the living room, and the half-finished decluttering and organizational projects all about.
Next, we had to deal with the car issue. Our credit isn’t great, we had a limited amount of money to work with, and we really don’t want monthly payments. Also, sharing my daughter’s car with all of our schedules is impossible.
I like shopping for cars almost as much as I like hanging out in the DMV or the phone store.
In other words, not at all.
My family pulled together, started the search and headed out to solve the problem while leaving me at home to make peace with our home.
(and find peace for myself)
They can be simply amazing!
By the end of the day they had purchased a good, solid used car well within our budgeted car repair fund – newly established by our recent windfall.
It’s not even ugly! It’s a sharp-looking Volvo station wagon type vehicle. Lots of room for our lifestyle, but not too big to drive comfortably.
And although the house doesn’t look significantly better than it did this morning:
Anxiety dealt with and disasters averted.
Life is good!
Still feeling under the weather, but plodding along anyway.
Journal page done and posted. Yea me!
A check we have been waiting on finally came in a few days ago. I’d done lots of math in anticipation of its arrival in order to make the best use of it.
A few things were paid off and an emergency fund established.
And yesterday, our car (which had been struggling) let it be known that it was done for. A check-up at the mechanic’s verified what we had feared – the transmission is shot.
One step forward…
and two steps back.
It’s an old car and really not worth the money we would need to put into it to fix the transmission. It also needs some work on something that makes the front wheels and the back wheels go round and round together.
I know that was a pretty technical description of the problem, but let me put it in simpler terms…probably well over $500 for that fix.
And the air conditioner doesn’t work.
So, it looks like we will go car shopping.
On the bright side.
We have an emergency fund. We only had it for a couple of days, but it still counts, right?
It’s not enough for a car, but it’s something, right?
It’s all going to be okay.
Nope, it’s definitely going to be okay.
Four pages done. Fifty-three more to go!
Productivity is losing momentum around here as a respiratory virus trudges through our family.
Not seriously ill, but not feeling 100% either.
Yesterday, I sorted through paper in the studio: going through magazines I’d saved for potential journal pages and possible class use. I pulled out anything that struck my fancy and gathered the rest up for recycling. A big bag full. I also sorted through papers that I had saved and decided that I didn’t need after all. It was hard parting with them for some insane reason. I kept thinking that I might need them for something.
The fear of not having what I need to create is a challenge that I’m dealing with right now. Actually creating is what’s important…more important than the potential of creating. Having the space available and access to what is needed is important.
Thinking about doing or actually doing?
It’s not complicated when you actually see it in black and white.
But nothing with emotions is every really simple.
I just read a great post about this very thing. She talks about her clothing issues, but the train of thought applies to anything that we are trying to declutter and the emotional aspect of it. Here’s the link:
The whole decluttering process is about so much more than the stuff. There are all kinds of motivational catch phrases that apply, but I’m liking this one right now…
I believe the past should be learned from and visited for the good memories. I don’t want to live there.
The future should be planned for and anticipated, but not feared.
The present is for living and doing.
I’m trying to make choices today that make it all possible.
Page 1 of the fifty-seven page journal project is done…
I also sorted through all the fabric, lace and trim in the studio.
Stuff that I don’t love anymore has been bagged up to donate or thrown away depending on it’s potential.
And as a result of looking through and handling the pieces, a new project has been started with what remains.
Pictures will be posted when sufficient progress has been made or, in other words…when it actually starts to resemble the pictures in my head.
The stuff that made it through the “purge” is being neatly organized and stored in one area of the studio instead of all over the place. Two medium sized boxes of fabric and one shoe box of trim and lace are all there is.
End result of this decluttering project: one box for the thrift store and a big bag of trash.
Less stuff to deal with and two creative projects undertaken!
A good day…