“The real enemies of our life are the ‘oughts’ and the ‘ifs’. They pull us backward into the unalterable past and forward into the unpredictable future. But real life takes place in the here and now” – Henri Nouwen
I wanted to put in a garden this year. I had hoped for a greenhouse. I’d planned on building numerous raised beds and filling them with the compost I was making and then planting seeds. I’d intended to have all my existing beds weeded and dug and ready for spring.
There is no greenhouse. Two raised beds are built but not filled with soil. They lean against the side of the house. There are weeds in my garden beds.
I ought to have gotten more done. If I’d gotten these things accomplished, I would be ready for the garden that I had hoped for and envisioned…
But now, today, I have a choice. I can work with what I have here and now and choose to place my seeds into soil…
or leave the seeds
in their packages
in the shoe box
on the shelf
in the cabinet
in the dining room
in the dark
where they will surely not sprout and grow.
How many other aspects of my life does this same thought process apply to?
Brushes not dipped into paint create nothing.
Blog posts not written can’t be read.
Cards not created and mailed can’t be received.
Art cards not imagined, created and shared can’t be found.
How often does my fear of imperfection or failure or rejection keep me from trying?
I have all the “seeds” I need both literally and figuratively…
seeds and soil and canvases and paint and ideas…
I also have fear and anxiety and doubts…
It is my choice to make…
Dwell on the mistakes and rejections of the past?
Anticipate with fear and anxiety the future?
Or do the work of my hands in the here and now with the potential to bring a little hope and beauty and light into the world?
Today I choose to believe in the potential of the seed to sprout and take root and grow and bless the world.